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Man Arrested For Jacking Off Horse and Himself at Same Time

GRAND RHONDE, Oregon —

Okay, we’re a bit late with this story that happened earlier this summer, but we don’t care. This guy deserves a spot on our website.

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Oregon Live reports that 56-year-old Glen B. Garbutt was spotted by the horse’s owner “masturbating himself and the horse at the same time” on Garbutt’s property. It’s still unclear how the horse got onto Garbutt’s property.

When the owner yelled at Garbutt to stop, he ran away. A Polk County Sheriff’s deputy looked for Garbutt but didn’t find him until a few days later when the officer got a tip that Garbutt was at a Seventh Day Adventist’s church.

When the officer told Garbutt he was under arrest for suspicion for sexual assault on an animal, Garbutt responded defensively, “I didn’t have sex with a horse!”

At that point, the deputy had not mentioned anything about a horse.

According the affidavit, Garbutt told police during questioning, “I couldn’t have had sex with a horse because I hate horses.”

Garbutt was booked into the Polk County Jail on charges of sexual assault of an animal, resisting arrest and interfering with a police officer.

WTF!?

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